Why Mindfulness Meditation May Not Be Your Thing?

Don’t get me wrong. A lot of people benefit from mindfulness meditation, myself included. Particularly, a lot of counseling gurus would suggest the practice of mindfulness when answering the newbies’ questions— “How did you do this? How did you do that?” Indeed, effective counselors’ “secrete” is nothing fancy. Often times, all they need to do is to be mindful of their inner reactions (often use them to guide therapists’ moves in therapy), and also be mindful of the client’s responses to certain interventions so that their therapists have a better idea of what is really going on right now. It is easier said than done, though.

So, yes, I benefit tremendously from mindfulness meditation personally and professionally, yet I think it is still important to discuss the risks of getting into mindfulness meditation.

Let’s start from “what is mindfulness?” “what is meditation?” and “what is mindfulness meditation?”

My answer is,

Mindfulness is noticing with a sense of curiosity and without judgment. Mindfulness is a state of mind. 

Meditation is a kind of practice where you typically get into a sitting posture and you try to set your mind on a particular object, thought, or activity. You can practice mindfulness in meditation (that’s mindfulness meditation) or something else (e.g., saying a prayer). 

I want to talk about those concepts to let you know that you don’t have to limit your mindfulness practice to meditation. In fact, a lot of people find it challenging to sit still and “force” their mind onto something. Since mindfulness is a state of mind, you can practice it in almost all kinds of life settings. For instance, in China, we have a traditional way of drinking Chinese tea (Kong Fu Cha) in which you follow all your sensations to savor the process. To me, it is a perfect mindfulness practice.

Personally, I like to do mindful eating, mindful walking, and mindful movement. Remember, your therapist’s hope for you is not to make you a mindfulness meditation guru. Instead, it is mindful living that we are after. That is, to learn to follow your curiosity without quickly judging your experience as right or wrong, good or bad. In the state of mindful living, there is a sense of sufficiency, safety, and freedom. And you also become more creative when handling a difficult situation.

In the state of mindful living, there is a sense of sufficiency, safety, and freedom. And you also become more creative when handling a difficult situation.

In therapy, I do notice that some clients struggle with mindfulness practice (no matter it is meditation or any other forms of mindfulness practice). That is why I believe it is critical to find yourself a guide person at the beginning of this journey to reduce risks.

One risk I have noticed is that, as one gets into mindfulness, some negative thoughts and feelings become more noticeable and can even become triggering. Before, the negative thoughts and feelings may be buried deep to protect you from getting overwhelmed. Without a guide, you may not be able to navigate the emotional turmoils (esp. if they are parts of trauma) alone.

Another risk is that, the self-criticizing voice (Who doesn’t have one?) can frustrate the newbies when they believe that they did not do mindfulness the right way. (Truth is, there is no “right” way to do mindfulness because “right”or “wrong” are not how we look at things in the mindfulness world. For example, when we notice our restless mind, the fact that we are noticing it is precisely the practice of mindfulness.)

I co-facilitated a mindfulness meditation group during my internship years ago. I notices that reflecting on experiences (similar or distinct) within the group helped members’ normalize their concerns and appreciate individuals’ unique experience with mindfulness. You might want to find a local group and start from there.

*Want to know know about mindfulness? Check out the Resource page on my website!